That joke isn't funny anymore

[grayfox7]

I love this. That whole sequence in MGS2 is fantastic.

[defectivegnome]

Today is an important day, Citizens. It shall be a day of great celebration, but first, we must cleanse the palette with some underboob.

[defectivegnome]

First of all, all parties require dancing and since I know we aren't all up on the latest dance steps, I present to you a handy diagram showing the proper way to get down this evening.

I think this is simple enough to follow, but, for great fortune and a good future, you must remember to sing this while you dance:
"You put your down down. You thrust your pelvis, HUH! You thrust your pelvis, HUH!"

[defectivegnome]

There's nothing I can do about your guests. It's completely up to you to decide the right people to invite. All I can do is give you some idea of whether your party is going well or not.
If it's going well, your party will look like this:

Sans Arnold, unless you're very lucky.
If you're too much of a nerd to have cool friends, then your party will soon resemble this.

If this happens to you, IMMEDIATELY buy some hookers and mass quantities of alcohol. Also, if possible, make sure your DJ is a f**king TRANSFORMER WITH SOME AWESOEMEF UCKING TUNES ON HIS GHETTOBLASTER OMG! These two suggestions might just save your life/sausage fest of a party.

[defectivegnome]

Now, as this is a family message board, I can't get very detailed in this part of the guide.
But it is at this point where you should have hopefully gotten a woman drunk enough that she is not completely repulsed by your appearance and personality. This will take less beer if you properly select a woman with low self esteem to begin with. What you should worry about is just how fast this woman is going to sober up. Therefore an approach similar to www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8RnOKTS3vw seems best. Now, remember, this man is a trained professional. While it is a good idea to learn from him, never expect yourself to be able to match his speed.

Yes, the video is worksafe

[defectivegnome]

This really doesn't have anything to do with the rest of my posts today, but it's just too f**king awesome that it definitely should be posted on this very special day.

[defectivegnome]

I post this in hopes of avoiding any people getting pissed at what I said earlier.

[defectivegnome]

[germloucks]

In conclusion;

[Chalupa!]

So far, the underboob is the best.

[defectivegnome]

I guess it's all downhill from here. There's really no way to top underboob.

[greeny]

why is there a trap hole in a convenience store?

[grayfox7]

Don't question it, greeny. Just scroll back up and look at that girl again...

[defectivegnome]

Pirate keyboard

1337 h4x0r, annoying teenager, etc. keyboard

Windows Keyboard

I'm not sure what this has to do with keyboards

[defectivegnome]

I have a fever and the only prescription is for pictures of cats. That and morphine.